Stilhed!

Beccys place November challance is on... To days letter is "H".

H= Horizon. I think it looks cold! The ice bergs look like Greenland. Where Danes believe Santa comes from.

Nice to be able to report that it has been "almost" quiet here at home.

Lars visited Skejby University Hospital where he spoke to a specialist in neurology. The hospital in Randers, where we live, and where Lars is hospitalized when he gets sick, had asked the doctors in Skejby to assess whether or nat, there was anything they could help.

As expected, the answer was that there was not anything we coul do! We spoke openly with the specialist about our attitude to the end of life: that there should be no unnecessary treatment, for example in the case of cardiac arrest, pneumonia, etc. that is, if the future is only to lay like a "vegetable".

We told him, that we have found the place where Lars would like to be buried, and that we are know that the  diagnoses he has, are all life-shortening. The doctor then told us, that it will be the liver that will end Lars' sufflerings.  

After the we drove to Lars' sister Inger. Lars didn't know that. It was nice to be able to surprise him. It was so good to see Inger again.

The week after Lars and I had been to Skejby University Hospital, I sat there myself, together with my daughter-in-law.  I went here to find out,  if I should have another operation for the new 3 herniated discs that I have. They have chosen not to operate. An operation with stiffening my bag, will not have much chance of success, and the pain will probably only get worse. I was really happy that my daughter-in-law Mia was with me. It gave the opportunity to talk about it afterwards.

Right before we went out the door, after the consultation, the specialist gave me some advice. looked me in the eye as he said: 

Do the things Lars wants, NOW. Later it is too late.

This is good advice for all of us. Enjoy the time together - do what makes you happy, what builds you up, what strengthens you. Create memories. Make a difference - before it's too late.

Hej
Dejligt at kunne berette at der næsten har været stille herhjemme.
Lars har været på besøg på Skejby Universitets Hospital hvor han snakkede med en speciallæge i Nerologi. Sygehuset i Randers, hvor vi bor, og hvor Lars er indlagt når han bliver syg, havde bedt lægerne i Skejby om at vurdere om der var noget som de kunne hjælpe.

Som forventet blev svaret at det var der ikke. Vi talte åbent med lægen om vores holdning til livets afslutning: at der ikke skal være unødig behandling, f.eks ved hjertestop, lungebetændelse ect. hvis fremtiden kun er at ligge som en "grøntsag".
Vi fortalte at vi har fundet det sted hvor Lars gerne vil begraves, og at vi er afklaret med, at de mange diagnoser han har, alle er livsforkortende. Overlægen sagde derpå, at det vil være leveren som tager livet af Lars til sidst. 
Som en overraskelse kørte vi efter samtalen ud til Lars' søster Inger. Lars vidste det ikke. Det var dejlig endelig at kunne overraske ham. Ligeledes var det dejlig at se Inger igen.

Ugen efter Lars og jeg havde været på  Skejby Universitets Hospital, sad jeg der selv, sammen med min svigerdatter.  Jeg skulle have af vide om jeg skulle opereres igen for de nye diskusprolaps som jeg har fået. Det har man valgt ikke at gøre. En operation med stivgørelse vil ikke have stor chance for at lykkes, og smerterne vil med sandsynlighed blot blive værre. Jeg var rigtig glad for at min svigerdatter Mia, var med mig. Det gav mulighed for at snakke om det bagefter.

Lige til sidst:
På vej ud af døren efter konsultationen om Lars, gav Overlægen mig et råd. Han så mig i øjnene, medens han sagde: 

Gør de ting Lars gerne vil, NU. Senere er det for sent.

Det er et godt råd for os alle. Nyd tiden sammen - gør hvad gør dig/jer glad, hvad der opbygger dig/jer, hvad der styrker dig/jer. Skab minder. Gør en forskel - før det er for sent.   

 

I feel so tired!

 

https://beccysplace.com/candy-canes-digital-stamps/ # 30

https://kraftychickschallenge.blogspot.com/ #28

When we started writing about Lars' illness - perhaps to open more up  about the difficult journey of dementia and Parkinson's - we could't have imagine where this journey would take us. There have been ups and downs. Unfortunately, this is a difficult part of the journey.

In the past month I have felt like giving up several times! I have prayed and prayed for strength and insight to understand the meaning behind what is happening around us.

If I didn't experience it myself, I would think it was either exaggerated or free imagination.

Shortly after my last post, it all went wrong. In short, Lars has been hospitalized 3 times in one month. The first 2 times he had liver coma. The last time, with gastroparesis. Which put the liver out of action and thus a 3rd "ugly" liver coma.

Eventually, his Parkinson's began to take over. He began to have difficulty walking. He had difficulty eating and I had to feed him. This I did gladly, but cried within, as I ached so much for his sake. I don't understand why he has toenduregh so much.

https://seniorshop.dk/tallerken-steelite-stor260550g.html

When I first bought this plate, Lars refused to eat from it. "He didn't need something like that!" 

Lars has now asked me to find it. He has realized that he can't eat from an ordinary plate. This plate has curved edges, which cause the food to "fall" back onto the cutlery when it is pulled up to the edge. 

The 2nd time he was hospitalized, I learned that these bouts of lliver cirrhosis will manifest more and more frequently, in the time ahead.

He has now started on 2 types of medicine - as an experiment. There is no subsidy for them. But the hospital will apply for funding via the Danish Medicines Agency.

Here the last time, I myself was hospitalized! It was so surrealistic to lie in one place and know that my beloved husband was lying and fighting somewhere else. Our daughter went back and forth between us. At one point she took a picture of Lars, which made me so uneasy that I asked to be discharged. They didn't agree to that, but the doctors said that I could visit Lars and reassure him - if only I came back quickly.

We are now both finally discharged. Lars' numbers are stable, but not "normal".

As he is now to well to stay at the hospital, and not ready to come home, he has come on nursing home. He will be there for 7-14 days. It will be difficult for me, I would rather have him home. However, I am not trained to take care of him. The thought of overlooking symptoms that I should be responding to, scares me.

We know that the diagnoses (Dementia, Parkinson's, diabetes and liver cirrhosis), he has are all life-shortening. But it's hard to see the one you love having such a hard time.

Finally, thanks to everyone who has listened and helped us recently. Thank you very much.~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Da vi begyndte at skrive om Lars' sygdom - for måske at åbne mere op om demens og Parkinsons svære rejse -  var vi ikke klar over hvorhen rejsen ville føre os hen. Der har været op - og nedture.

Desværre er dette en svært del af rejsen.

I den forgange måned har jeg flere gange haft lyst til at give op! Jeg har bedt og bedt om styrke og indsigt til at forstå meningen men hvad der sker omkring os.

Hvis jeg ikke selv oplevede det som sker, ville jeg tro det var enten overdreven eller fri fantasi.

Kort efter mit sidste indlæg, gik det helt galt. Kort sagt, Lars har været indlagt 3 gange på en måned. De 2 gange var med leverkoma. Her den sidste gang, med gastroparese. Hvilket satte leveren ud af funktion og dermed en 3. "grim" leverkoma.

Til sidst begyndte det at gå ud over hans Parkinson. Han begyndte at have svært ved at gå. Han havde svært ved at spise, og jeg måtte made ham. Dette gjorde jeg med glæde, men græd indeni, da jeg smertede på hans vegne. Jeg forstår ikke hvorfor han skal så meget igennem.

https://seniorshop.dk/tallerken-steelite-stor260550g.html

Da jeg første gang købte denne tallerken, nægtede Lars at spise af den. "Sådan en havde han ikke brug for!" Lars har nu bedt mig finde den. Han har indrømmet, at han ikke kan spise af en alm. tallerken. Denne har buede kanter, som får maden til at "falder" tilbage på bestikket, når det køres op ad kanten.

Den 2. gang han var indlagt, fik jeg af vide, at disse anfald af leverkoma vil blive manifisteret oftere og oftere i tiden der ligger foran os.

Han er nu begyndt på 2 typer medicin - som et forsøg. Der er ikke tilskud til dem. Men sygehuset vil søge om tilskud via Legemiddelstyrelsen.

Her den sidste gang Lars var indlagt, blev jeg selv indlagt samtidig! Det var surrealistisk at ligge et sted, og vide at min elskede ægtemand lå og kæmpede et andet sted. Vores datter gik frem og tilbage imellem os. På et tidspunkt tog hun et billede af Lars, som gjorde mig så urolig, at jeg bad om at blive udskrevet. Det ville man ikke gå med til, men lægerne gik med til, at jeg kunne besøge Lars og berolige ham - hvis jeg blot kom hurtig tilbage hurtigt.

Vi er nu begge endelig udskrevet. Lars' tal er stabile, dog ikke "normale".

Da sygehuset ikke kan gøre mere for ham, og han ikke er fuldstændig i stand til at komme hjem, er han kommet på aflastning. Der skal han være i 7-14 dage. Det bliver svært for mig, jeg ville hellere have ham hjem. Jeg er dog ikke uddannet til at tage mig af ham. Tanken om at overse symptomer, som jeg burde reagere på, skræmmer mig.

Vi ved godt at de diagnoser han har, (Demens, Parkinsons, diabetes og levercirrhose, alle er livsforkortende. Men det svært at se den man elsker have det så svært.

Til slut, tak til alle som har lyttet og hjulpet os den sidste tid. Tusind tak.

Some good news!

 

A different Christmas card!

I was looking at my digi-stamps. Suddenly I thought: There really is no need to have pictures on a Christmas card. Beccy makes so many Christmas texts that are beautiful to look at. These should be able to be a card in themselves.

Jeg sad og kikkede på digi-stamps. Pludselig tænkte jeg: Der behøver egentlig ikke at være billeder på et julekort. Beccy laver så mange juletekster som er smukke at se på. Disse bør være et kort i selv.

This tekst's from:
https://beccysplace.com/peace-and-joy-digital-stamps/

Finally - There is only good news in this update!

Lars has more energy than his has had in a very long time. This means he can do a little more, and wants to do more. He doesn't sleep as much - it's just so lovely.

Saturday evening he said: I want to go to church tomorrow. Can we do it? Of course!  It has been over a year since he last went to church. 

I felt so grateful to be able to sit next to him in church. After church, many members came and greeted  him. His eyes shone more and more.

When we got home he had lunch, but only ate a little - then he slept for 2 hours. It had taken a lot of effort to go to church. But never mind! He went to church, that's what mattered.

Lars has been to several tests in the past week, and all of them have shown a kind of "standstill". I will choose stagnation over deterioration at all times.

Thank you for joining us on our journey. We are really happy to be able to come up with a more positive update this time.

Der er kun gode nyheder i denne opdatering - endelig.

Lars har mere energi, end hans meget længe har haft. Det betyder han kan lidt mere, og gerne vil mere. Han sover ikke så meget - det er bare så dejlig.

Lørdag aften sagde han: Jeg vil gerne i kirke i morgen. Kan vi det? Selvfølgelig!  Det er over et år siden han sidst har været i kirke. 

Jeg er så taknemmelig for at kunne sidde ved siden af ham i kirken. Efter kirken kom mange hen og hilste på ham. Hans øjne strålede mere og mere.

Da vi kom hjem spiste han lidt - og sov 2 timer. Det havde taget mange kræfter at tage afsted. Men pyt! Han kom i kirke, det var det som betød noget.

Lars har været til flere prøver i den uge som er gået, og alle har vist stilstand. Jeg vil til enhver tid vælge stilstand frem for forværring.

Tak fordi I følger med i vores rejse. Vi er rigtig glade for at kunne komme med en mere positiv opdatering denne gang.

Look at his smile! He was so happy to be able to go to church.

Se lige hans smil! Han var så glad for at være i kirke.

The first potatos from our garden. Yummi!

Mums! Årets første kartofler fra vores egen lille have.

I wonder how big, our largest potato will be this year. Last year it was 400 gr. There's a long way...

Hvor stor bliver mon den største kartoffel i år! Sidste år var det 400 gr. Der er vist lang ven endnu...

I am in the process of freezing berries from the garden - in portions. It's for Lars' protein drink.

Now that he is not allowed to eat peas etc. anymore, I also make small portions of puree which I freeze. From left: peas/avocado/cream and broth. - cream - strawberry - blackcurrant - currant.

I use a recipe from the hospital. It is very similar to "koldskål".

Jeg er i gang med at fryse bær fra haven ned - i portioner. Det er til Lars' proteindrikke.

Nu hvor han ikke må spise ærter mm mere, så laver jeg også små portioner med pure som jeg nedfryser. Fra venstre: ærter/avocado/fløde og bouillon. - fløde - jordbær - solbær - ribs.

Jeg bruger en opskrift fra sygehuset. Den minder meget om koldskål.

What a night!

The garden is buzzing with life. If you are privileged enough to have a birdhouse, you also have the opportunity to follow the birds up close. I love being in the garden and hearing the day begin with just a few birds singing - to end in a heavenly symphony of birdsong. This card is made with a new digi stamp from Beccysplace.com.

Haven summer af liv. Er du så privilegeret at have et fuglehus, har du også mulighed for at følge fuglene tæt på. Jeg elsker at være i haven og høre dagen begynde med blot et par fugle i sang – for at ende i en himmelsk symfoni af fuglesang. Dette kort er lavet med et nyt digistempel fra Beccysplace.com

This new beautiful digi-stamp from Beccysplace.com are called:

Precious Memories. Here's a link to where you can buy it:

https://beccysplace.com/precious-memories-digital-stamps/

Also shared on:
https://kraftychickschallenge.blogspot.com/ # 26

It has been, for the first time, in a long time, a super nice weekend - no DRAMA!
That is until Sunday night.

This even despite the storm on Saturday evening/night. Only at night (approx. 00.30) did I have to go out in the garden and around our house, to if see if everything was all right. There had been some very noise/sounds... it turned out that our small greenhouses, where our 4 tomato plants are, had fallen over.

I got them back up, but when the first strong wind came, one fell over again. Up again - and with my arms protectively around them both, it dawned on me that I couldn't save them if I didn't do anything.

The plastic that made up the greenhouse was in pieces, but was still lifted up and down, depending on which way the wind came. I then decided to remove the plastic. I remembered that a friend, Gerda Nørgaard, had once told me that she had had tomato plants out in the open... now my little tomato plants had to show if they can withstand the wind... so I removed my protective arms, and removed what was left of the plastic that protected them. Now,we just have to wait and see.

I hd not planned to go to Church. I lacked sleep due to everything a few hours before. but when our daughter called and asked if I wanted to come, I said, I would love to.
It was lovely to participate in our church service, sitting beside her - I love her so very much. She has so many talents, but most of all I admire her for standing up for what she belive is right - even if ofthers do not agree with her. Time and time again it has turned out SHE was right.
Afterwards we picked up Mads, our grandson, he came to our house and played most of the afternoon. At one point he was playing Minecraft out in the garden. He has a wonderful imagination.

Later, while Lars and I ate a late dinner, help came from the Outgoing group fra the Nursing home: It was time for medicine and getting ready for the night.  We asked if it was all right, if Lars just got the medecine, and I would helphim later when we had finished eating.

Suddenly Lars started to cough, then his face turned deep red. He couldn't breathe!

All little tricks in the book didn't work, the helper even performed the heimlich maneuver on Lars - he just started to go limp - then 911 was called.

An ambulance came with the serine going, and right after came a doctor in an medical taxa. During approx. 5 minutes there were suddenly many people in our little home. Again the heimlich maneuver was performed and the 3rd time the medic team did it - they got a free passage.

So what happened? Lars has dysphagia after neck surgery for a herniated disc. This means that he has difficulty eating some things, as it get hidden in a "pocket" in his throat: rice, peas, corn, spaghetti etc. but also tablets. A large tablet had become stuck! It took a lot of effort to loosen it again. 

Fortunately, it went well. Lars was shocked and tired. He went to bed straight afterwards, but as he still had the urge to cough, he had to partially sit up and sleep. Today he is all right and we are thankful that he has not been hurt.

Take care of each other. Life is fragile. Be wise and be grateful for those around you.

I wonder if the tomatoplants will survive!
Tomatplanterne skal bindes op... mon de klarer sig?

There are many blackberries in the garden this year.

Der er mange brombær i haven i år

We don't lack peas!

Ærter mangler vi ikke...

Nu er 2. omgang løg på vej. Den første høst i år gav 96 løg fordelt på 2 bede
Now the 2nd batch of onions is on its way. The first harvest this year yielded 96 bulbs spread over 2 raised beds

The first flowers are gone, now we are waiting for the 2nd round- this time the colours will be more "autum" like.
De første blomster er væk, nu venter vi på 2. omgang i "efterårsfarver".

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Det har for første gang i lang tid, været en super dejlig weekend - ingen DRAMA! Det vil sige indtil Søndag aften.

Dette endda på trods af stormen lørdag aften/nat. Først på natten (ca. 00.30) måtte jeg ud og se hvilke ting der skulle reddes, for der var kommet så mange høje lyde... det viste sig at vores små drivhuse, hvor vores 4 tomatplanter står, var væltet.
Jeg fik dem op igen, men da den første stærke vind kom, væltede den ene igen. Op igen - og med armene beskyttende om dem begge, gik det op for mig, at jeg ikke kunne redde dem, hvis jeg ikke gjorde noget.
Det plastik som udgjorde drivhuset, var i stykker, men blev aligevel løftet op og ned, alt efter hvordan vinden kom. Jeg besluttede så at fjerne plastikken. Jeg huskede på at en ven, Gerda Nørgaard, engang havde fortalt at hun havde haft tomatplanter i det fri... nu må mine små tomatplanter vise om de kan stå imod vinden... så jeg fjernede mine beskyttende arme, og fjernede det der var tilbage af plastikken, som beskyttede dem. Nu må vi se...

Søndag havde jeg ikke planlagt at tage i kirke; så da vores datter ringede og spurgte om jeg ville med, sagde jeg ja tak. Det var dejlig igen at deltage i vores gudstjeneste (vi kalder det Nadvermøde, da det er her, vi tager del i Nadveren). Bagefter hentede vi Mads, vores barnebarn. Han kom hjem til os og legede det meste af eftermiddagen. På et tidspunkt legede han Minecraft ude i have. Han har en dejlig fantasi.

Senere, medens Lars og jeg spiste sent aftensmaden, kom der hjælp fra Hjemmeplejens udegruppe: Medicin og i seng.  Vi aftalte,  at Lars blot skulle give medicinen, så ville jeg hjælpe med resten senere, når vi var færdige med at spise. Pludselig begyndte Lars at hoste, derefter blev han dybrød i ansigtet. Han kunne ikke få luft!
Alle små kneb virkede ikke, så 2 gange udførte hjælperen heimlich maneuveren på Lars - han begyndte at blive slap - så blev der ringet 112.
Der kom ambulance med udrykning og en lægeambulance bagefter. I løbet af ca. 5 min var der pludselig mange i vores lille hjem. Igen udførte man heimlich maneuveren og 3. gang lykkedes det at få fri passage.
Hvad var det så der skete? Lars har dysfagi efter en nakkeoperation for en diskusprolaps. Det betyder at nogle ting har han svært ved at spise, da det gemmer sig i en "lomme" i halsen: Ris, ærter, majs, spaghetti mm. men også tabletter. En stor tablet havde sat sig fast! Der skulle mange kræfter til for at løsne den igen. 
Heldigvis gik det godt. Lars var chokeret, og træt. Han kom i seng lige bagefter, men da han stadig havde trang til at hoste, måtte han delvis sidde op og sove. I dag er han ok, og vi er taknemmelig for at han ikke har taget skade.
Pas på hinanden. Livet er skrøbeligt. Lev livet viist, og vær taknemmelig for dem du har omkring dig.

An opdate I hate to make.

This beautiful stamp is called: peace and joy 
It's from Beccysplace.
I'm going to make 10 of them. I really like this Winter digi-stamp.

Just a little update.

Over the last few weeks, Lars has been sleeping more and more; and he has been increasingly unclear.

A week ago, he began to get a yellow tone to his skin.
I called the outgoing team at the nursing home, and they send an assistant to look at him. She called a doctor. Together they agreed that an emergency nurse should be sent to our home. She could measure some values ​​that the assistent cannot.
When they were taken, the nurse consulted with the doctor, and together they agreed that Lars should be hospitalized.

Unfortunately, his liver is not working optimally again. He has a liver coma again - just like 1½ years ago. Luckily not as bad, because I spotted the yellow spots. 

We knew this would happen again. We are just blessed that it has taken this long.

Sadness that he has to go through this, is the feeling that fills me.
At the same time, I am grateful to live in a time - and in a country - where you can get help.

Unfortunately, a scan also showed that he has a fracture of L4 and a collapse further up the back. (this is not related to the lever coma).
The fracture is probably due to a fall he had a few weeks ago. As he was about to fall, he reached for a bookcase, which fell on top of him.

NB: He came home to day-jubiiii

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Bare en lille opdatering.
Igennem de sidste par uger, har Lars sovet mere og mere. Han har været tiltagende mere uklar.

For en uge siden, var han også gul. Han blev tilset af plejehjemmets assistent, som talte med en læge. Sammen aftalte de at der skulle sendes en akut sygeplejerske hjem til os. Hun kunne måle nogle værdier, som plejecentret ikke kan. Da de var taget, konsulterede hun med lægen, og sammen blev de enige om, at Lars skulle indlægges.

Desværre arbejder hans lever ikke optimalt igen. Han har fået en leverkoma igen - ligesom for 1½ år siden. Heldigvis ikke så slem, fordi jeg opdagede de gule pletter. 

Vi vidste godt det ville ske igen. Vi er bare velsignet med at det er gået så lang tid. Tristhed over at han skal det igennem, er den følelse som fylder mig. Samtidig er jeg taknemmelig for at leve i en tid - og i et land, hvor man kan få hjælp.
Desværre viste en scanning også at han har et brud på L4 og et sammenfald længere oppe i ryggen; hvilket ikke har noget med leverkomaen at gøre.
Bruddet skyldes nok et fald han havde for nogle uger siden.
Da han var ved at falde, greb han ud efter en reol, som faldt ned over ham. 

PS: Han er kommet hjem i dag, jubiiii 

I had to try to make an organiser to fit all my glue!

I took our grandson, Mads, out to a strawberry field. He had so much fun. He ran up and down the field, and of cause he had to taste the berries.