En svær og alligevel et let indlæg

 

String Candle, old digi-stamp from  Beccys Place

This is probably one of the hardest blog posts I've made in a while. 

    Here at home we are very open about what is happening with Lars, everyone knows it, family members, our doctor, helpers etc.

    What we haven't told you, the readers, is that Lars has had blood in his urine for almost 3 months. A visit to the hospital changed our lives -  for a while.

    The head doctor told us that we shouldn't expect Lars would live, come Christmas.

    A bit of a message, since we had previously been told that he had about 2 years.

    Lars has opted out of all treatment now. Only what is needed to function in everyday life.

    This decision was made before the message at the hospital, but was further cemented based on the message he received from the head doctor.

We as a family probably felt that at the beginning it was right. Lars lost 6.5 kg in 10 days. He became a shadow of what he used to be.

But that changed. He had something he wanted to do - before it ended here on earth.

    Among other things, his greatest wish was to come to the Temple on Priorvej in Copenhagen one last time. Our son-in-law made it possible by driving Lars, Kami and I the long way to Copenhagen - and back home, the same day. It's a trip we still talk about . We will for ever be grateful to Aske and Kami for driving, and for their help throughout the day. An eternal memory was created this day.

    The trip did something for Lars. It gave him a light, a hope for experiences that were still possible.

    Lars woke up - and doubts about whether it was the right prognosis for the future crept under our skin. Yes, Lars IS sick, we know that. But the chief physician's words that we would be lucky if he was here for Christmas? Was it true?

    We know his time on earth is limited; but it really is for all of us: none of us knows the day we will leave here.

    Our daughter-in-law has been to doctor's appointments with Lars and me. I need extra ears to hear, so that I don't misunderstand - and so that I don't give the wrong information to the family - and you . In the future, Mia will therefore also read through my posts so that they are correct. Not that they weren't before, but the time ahead will be difficult, and it may be difficult to remember everything, and perhaps put things together correctly, because emotions will be put to the test even more.

    On Wednesday, our GP was at our home together with Home Care, Mia and Inger. Our general practitioner, Dr. Otto does not see Lars as terminal. He does not think that you can say that he is not here for Christmas - nor that he is! Everything is on the table, you can not promise anything - because Lars, like all of us, can be affected by an infection or something similar that he cannot fight. So, to set an timetable - it is difficult.

    It was a relief beyond comparison. It confirmed our growing gut feeling that the time frame was wrong. It was also confirmed that Lars decides whether he wants to be treated or not, should it become necessary to hospitalize him.

It was officially decided that Mia or Lars' sister Inger (if it is possible for one of them), will go with us to the doctor or hospital. It is also written in his medical record. It is a fantastic relief. We have 100% trust in them. Knowing that they'll be there is the best gift we could get.

Finally:

Lars is doing well, he has no pain, and is confident.

What I have learned:

Live life, Appreciate the gift that life is. Take advantage of its opportunities at all times.

We believe in a life after this, but that does not mean that we should not live life here. We should EXPLOIT life, LIVE life, APPRECIATE life and everything it gives.

But most of all: Love each other, tell it to eachother! Appreciate the gift that is being able to share love with each other, family and friends.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dette er nok en af det sværeste, og det med hjertet letteste blog-post jeg har lavet længe.

~

    Herhjemme er vi meget åbent om hvad der sker med Lars, det ved alle, læge, hjælpere osv.

    Hvad vi ikke har fortalt jer, læserne, er at Lars har haft blod i hans urin i snart 3 måneder. Et besøg på sygehuset, forandrede vores liv, for en stund.

    Overlægen fortalt at vi ikke skulle forvente at have Lars til jul. Lidt af en besked, eftersom vi tidligere havde fået af vide, at han have omk. 2 år.

    Lars har fravalgt al behandling nu. Kun lige det som skal til for at fungere i dagligdagen. Denne beslutning var truffet før beskeden på sygehuset, men blev yderligere cementeret på baggrund af den besked som han fik af overlægen.

    Vi som familie følte nok, i begyndelsen af den var rigtig.  Lars tabte sig 6.5 kg på 10 dage. Han blev en skygge af hvad han plejede at være. Men det forandrede sig. Han havde ting som han gerne ville - før det var slut her på jorden.

    Bl.a. var hans største ønske at komme til Templet på Priorvej i København en sidste gang. Vores svigersøn gjorde det muligt, ved at køre Lars, Kami og jeg, den lange vej til København - og hjem igen, den samme dag.

Det er en tur vi stadig snakker om. Vi vil for altid være Aske og Kami taknemmelig for at køre, og for deres hjælp igennem hele dagen. Der blev skabt et evigt minde denne dag.

    Turen gjorde noget andet for Lars. Det gav ham et lys, et håb om oplevelser, som stadig var muligt.

    Lars livede op - og tvivl om det var den rette fremtids prognose krøb ind under huden. Jo, Lars ER syg, det ved vi. Men overlægens ord om, at vi skulle være heldige hvis han var her til jul? Var den rigtig?

Vi ved hans tid på jorden er begrænset; men det er den egentlig for os alle: ingen af os kender den dag vi skal afsted herfra.

    Vores svigerdatter har været med til lægesamtaler. Jeg har brug for ekstra ører til at høre, så jeg ikke misforstår - og så jeg ikke kommer til at give forkerte oplysninger til familien  - og jer. Fremover, vil Mia også gennemlæse mine indlæg, så de er rigtige. Ikke at de ikke var det før, men tiden fremover, vil blive svær, og det kan være svært at huske alt, og måske sætte tingene rigtig sammen, fordi følelserne blive endnu mere sat på prøve.

    Onsdag var vores praktiserende læge hjemme hos os sammen med Hjemmeplejen, Mia og Inger. Vores praktiserende læge, Dr. Otto, ser ikke Lars som terminal. Han mener ikke, at man kan sige, at han ikke er her til jul - og heller ikke at han er! Alt er på bordet, man kan ikke love noget - for Lars kan, ligesom os alle, blive ramt af en infektion eller lignende, som han ikke kan bekæmpe. Så at fastsætte en tidsplan - det er svært.

    Det var en ubeskrivelig lettelse. Det bekræftede vores voksende mavefornemmelse om, at tidsrammen var forkert. Det blev også bekræftet, at Lars selv bestemmer, om han vil behandles eller ej, hvis det bliver nødvendigt at indlægge ham.

Det blev officielt besluttet, at Mia eller Lars' søster Inger (hvis det er muligt for en af ​​dem), skal med os til lægen eller hospitalet. Det står også i hans journal. Det er en fantastisk lettelse. Vi har 100% tillid til dem. At vide, at de vil være der, er den bedste gave, vi kunne få.

Tilslut:

Lars har det godt, han har ingen smerter, og er fortrøstningsfuld.

Det jeg lærer er: Lev livet, påskøn den gave livet er. Udnyt dets muligheder til alle tider.

Vi tror på et liv efter dette, men det betyder ikke, at vi ikke skal leve livet her. Vi skal UDNYTTE livet, LEVE livet, PÅSKØNNE livet og alt det giver.

Men mest af alt: Elsk hinanden, fortæl det! Påskøn den gave det er at kunne dele kærligheden med hinanden, familien og venner.

Se lige hvad min søn, Jimmy, lavede for mig: Holdere til alle mine copic-tusser. Jubiii

Holderne sættes fast på 2 Skådis hulplader, fra Ikea.

 

 

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